Well, I had the most appalling childhood.

But this time of the year she was in her vaults, underground, and here she resided alone, spending most of her life in darkness, like a tongue.

You don’t have to be “insane” to cut people up, no matter how fiendishly you do it. You just have to hate enough.

Concealing the Ripper was not a Masonic conspiracy, but a conspiracy of Her Majesty’s executive, who almost without exception were Freemasons. In other words, it was a conspiracy of the System.

He didn’t like religion, hadn’t liked it for years, but he adored churches, loved them like old scientific instruments whose time is long past but are nevertheless fascinating and strange.

When you see a giant, make sure it isn’t a dwarf standing in a favourable light. Thus we approach ’the mystery of Jack the Ripper.

You can’t be a 20-mile a day eater if you’re just a 5-mile a day runner.

I don’t advise a haircut, man. All hairdressers are in the employment of the government. Hairs are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos, and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.

You can't be a 20-mile a day eater if you're just a 5-mile a day runner.

When I was writing 'Withnail,' I was so busted flat that I had one lightbulb that I would carry around the house with me. I mean, really. No furniture, no money, and I was hoping to be an actor, but I could never get a job.